CNN tells me the whole world is abuzz over the imminent release of the Snapple Phone 5… or was it the Gooseberry Smellphone 9981… or maybe the Androgynous Flan 4.2? Somehow the exact name escapes me – tasty as they all sound – probably because I’m completely sold on my own, personal mobile device: the truly versatile NOkidd’n NOphone. Believe it or not, my NOphone has been serving me faithfully for 71 years, nonstop and has never gone out of range and never let me down, even in the remote and barren wastes of the Saudi desert where I once spent some time.
Still more extraordinary, I’ve never had to change the battery in all that time and as for operating costs, I have yet to pay even a centavo. So, in my opinion, when it comes to telephones, there’s nothing quite so good as NOphone! Allow me to enumerate its other virtues:
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